I’ve been at home with Corrine since day one. There was never a doubt that I would stay at home with my kids if it made sense for our family. And I’m very lucky that I can be with her everyday and the same for when we welcome babe #2. It’s been quite the learning experience. Particularly, about balancing the positives and negatives. Most days, I can honestly say the positives outweigh the negatives. Expecting a child is filled with hope and excitement. And being a mom to an almost two year old brings a new day everyday and she never ceases to amaze me with how much she’s learning and growing. But it doesn’t leave alot of time for mom and that’s ok. Until, she’s down for her nap and I sit in front of this computer to attend to things I want/need to accomplish during this short down time.
Lately, I’m struggling with what I’ve had to sacrifice to to be a stay at home mom, specifically my career and ambitions. Big ambitions both personal and professional. Getting this blog going reminds me that I don’t have what I want. And others do. I’m jealous and it’s not a good feeling. Of course, the logical side of me knows that things take time and you have to work diligently towards a goal. But when have you known a pregnant mom to be logical? I don’t think they exist and if they do they are a rare bird. So right now, I’ll write these feelings out in the hopes it will help.
I struggle with jealousy when I log onto social media and I see my friends doing good things with their jobs, getting promotions, accomplishing goals and making an impact. Social media can be a real bitch for my jealousy right now. Have you ever felt that way? I’ve been doing alot of research on how to create a blog site people want to read. This involves visiting lots of other blog sites and seeing what they’re doing right. I have to remind myself that this blog is entirely so I can share my thoughts on food, family and fitness to keep myself connected to my profession. And it takes time to build an audience. But I’m not patient 🙂
So instead of letting the negative tone of these thoughts get to me, I’m going to try to spin it to a positive (this is logical Julie speaking now). I talked about big ambitions both personal and professional, I’d like to be transparent with my goals. When you’ve got big goals, it helps to put them on paper, and/or tell someone to keep yourself accountable to them. So here it goes. This is what I want:
I want to grow this blog to create an online presence where I will be considered a nutrition/fitness expert. I want others to learn from what I write, and I want my reader to be motivated to make a positive change to their own health and wellness.
I want others to seek out my professional opinion for advice and recommendations whether it be for personal use, quoted in the media and/or speaking engagements.
Once I’m ready to re-join the work force, I want this blog site to be evidence that I’ve spent my time continuing my education, knowledge, and skills in the wellness world.
I want to be an Ironman. There it is. It’s a big goal of mine I’ve always had but have put it off until I was done having kids. Well, that time is fast approaching. We’re good with two kids. So I have to get on it.
I want to become a Les Mills trainer in BodyFlow. I’ve taken the steps to get there. I’ve been through advanced training and was fortunate enough to achieve elite instructor status. I’ve never been so passionate about spreading the love of fitness than when I’m teaching this class. I’d love the opportunity to share this passion with new instructors.
Don’t take this post in the wrong way. I am utterly grateful that I can stay at home with my kids (and I haven’t even met the little one yet). I couldn’t image my world without them. No one ever said they had wished they worked more on their death bed. I get that. I cherish these days where my kids need and want to be with me as I know they will grow up too fast.
What can you learn from this post? First, its ok to feel the feelings you feel. They are valid and there’s always a reason why you’re feeling them. Second, you need to acknowledge them. You need to be willing to learn from them and find a way to manage them. Think about how you can spin your negative thoughts into something positive. Trust me, you’ll feel better. Negative thoughts do nothing other than keep you in a bad place. Take the opportunity to turn it around, somehow, into something positive. Maybe it’s just identifying things that you are grateful for.
Questions for you:
If you’re a stay at home mom, how do you deal with your personal sacrifices for your family?
Do you ever get jealous?
Do you have ambitious goals? Are you brave enough to put them out there?